“Wherever I go, everyone is a little bit safer because I am there.
Wherever I am, anyone in need has a friend.
Whenever I return home, everyone is happy I am there.”
Before I got into Pick Up, when I was a firearms and tactical instructor, I put the Warrior Creed on the first page of every training manual I wrote. It resonated with me then, and even more so now.
The first part is what originally clicked. I was teaching survival skills, skills that people would hopefully NEVER need to use, but if they did need them, they would be prepared.
The 2nd part made sense because…..well anyone who knows me in real life, knows how I treat others, and also how I like to keep my good deeds private.
The last part, that was always the one that I felt I connected with the least. I wasn’t really close to my family, had a few close friends, but for the most part did my own thing. I could leave town for a week, and nobody would even know I was gone. I can remember thinking, if I died, how many people would even notice or miss me?
After I started my self improvement journey and then got into Pick Up, I learned how to connect with others on a deeper level. For the first time in my life, I actually started to think that people WOULD miss me, and that they would actually be excited to see me when I return.
Now I don’t just think that, I KNOW that!
Such a short and simple adage, which means so much
If each section doesn’t resonate with you-
what are you doing to change that?
what goals have you set in your life, and are you actively working on reaching them?
One of my recent goals was to eat sushi and drink sake in Japan, and as I prepare to fly there next week, I know that like always, everyone around me is safer, because I am there. No matter where I go, even if I can’t speak the language, I will make friends and have fun.
Lastly, I know that I will be missed and when I return, those I care about will be happy to see me.
-If I don’t fall in love with a Geisha girl or go to war with the Yakuza (sucks for THEM!), I should be back around the middle of the month. I will be checking my email and will get back to any customers as soon as I can throughout, but for much of this trip I will not have access to the internet. Which is exactly what I need
“Holy shit, I just had to call someone and share this, I am stuck in traffic on Fairfax and there is some fat homeless lady SHITTING in the gutter!”
“Well….welcome to LA!”
Anyone who has been stuck in LA traffic knows how insane it is- and just so you guys can fully appreciate it, here is a vid I took years ago where a handicapped dude with a wonked up leg, gets around faster than me in my truck!
Now that you know clearly how bad it is, this intersection is even worse, 3 lights later and I haven’t moved an inch.
So when she pulled down her filthy purple sweat pants and just started shitting away next to the CVS, I was stuck there for all of it’s glory.
As she started taking care of business, I looked around at all of the people who were also witnessing this horrible, HORRIBLE sight, and to see their reactions. (I at least wanted to get something good out of this!)
People in the cars around me either didn’t even see it (great level of awareness) or they pretended like they didn’t.
Just then a small group exited the CVS and turned left, heading right towards her……finally something good was going to come of this, the guys and the girl would see it and FREAK OUT resulting in lulz
….at least I imagined they would
Slowly they got closer….and closer…UNTIL
The girl moved her head a few inches to her right….then shot it straight forward again as they walked past her.
As soon as they got a few steps past the mad shitter, I saw her elbow the guy on the left, her eyes grow large and she mouthed the words
“OH MY GOD!”
They all looked over their shoulder for a second, turned around, exchanged a few words, but didn’t look back and didn’t stop walking.
So now one of the most horrible and disgusting sites I have ever witnessed in my life, only garnered a look and an elbow, thus resulting in me calling my friend to share it with her.
Afterwards it got me thinking, one of the BIGGEST fears guys have when approaching chicks is-
THE FEAR OF BEING WATCHED
What if people are watching me hit on her?
What if I get rejected in front of people?
What if they hear what I say?
Well here is some news for you
NO ONE GIVES A SHIT!
The dirty homeles lady TAKING A SHIT proved this!
There she was, shitting for the whole world to see and
Guess what, you know how you (currently or use to) walk around in your own bubble, with your head down, missing most of what goes on in the world, and worrying about everyone else judging you…
EVERYONE DOES THAT
and the people who don’t, don’t give a fuck about you, and they sure as fuck don’t give a shit about you walking over to a girl and hitting on her!
LOOK AT THAT HETROSEXUAL OVER THERE TALKING TO THAT HOT CHICK… LETS GET HIM BOYS!!!
So lesson #1 is
GET RID OF THAT IRRATIONAL FEAR ABOUT BEING WATCHED, YOU AREN’T THAT BIG OF A DEAL IN THEIR WORLD
Next up is the fear of rejection
When was the last time a dirty bum hit you up for some spare change?
How many times has this happened in your whole life?
(hard to remember isn’t it?)
I have gotten pretty good with my serious face throughout the years, homeless people usually know better than to ask me. I also really HATE it when those fuckers hit me up.
Ya let me GIVE you some of my money, that I worked hard for, so you can go eat, or more likely, go get some drugs- FOR FREE!!!
(but I will be honest, the last one who hit me up outside the UPS store had a dog and got 75 cents from me, using the sympathy pet card…well played you dirty bearded fuck…well played)
If a bum had AA or was scared of being rejected, he wouldn’t be able to eat, or score!
I usually just ignore them, but man have I heard some HORRIBLE shit said to them in my life!
So I have rejected, or flat out ignored more bums than I could even guess, but seconds later when I get in my car, I don’t give them a second thought.
EVEN if I did, all day, until I was in bed that night looking up at the ceiling, shaking a fist and screaming
“DAMN YOU YOU FILTHY BUM! HOW DARE YOU ASK ME FOR A QUARTER!!!!!”
it would have 0% effect on him and the rest of his life
I guarantee he has already forgotten about it, so the only place that it would “live on” is in my mind.
-and back to lesson #1, even if someone else saw it, they wouldn’t care either.
Just like us walking out of the grocery store, and we see the homeless guy start to snap into action, we kick into autopilot mode and deal with it and either blow him off, make an excuse, ignore him, or give him something.
EVERY other homeless guy before him has helped program our reaction.
So lets flip it, you approach some hottie and she blows you off.
EVERY other guy who has approached her had a hand her her reaction to you, so don’t take it personally.
2nd, if she does blow you out, seconds later she has ALREADY FORGOTTEN about you and isn’t giving you a 2nd thought, so why are you?
3rd even if she DID, all that night she kept fuming over the guy who talked to her and asked her about her opinion on something, she went home and took off her push up bra and fake eyelashes, and was looking in the mirror with bloodshot eyes full of anger towards you- you would’t even know and it has 0% effect on you.
So lesson #2 is
GET RID OF THAT POINTLESS FEAR OF REJECTION, IT’S GOING TO HAPPEN, IT DOESN’T MATTER, AND THE ONLY PLACE IT LIVES ON IS IN YOUR HEAD
One year after reading about Neil Strauss in THE GAME I became his HEAD COACH and was featured in the follow up best seller RULES OF THE GAME.
After running Style's PUA school for years and coaching thousands of men across the world, no matter your experience level or sticking points I am positive I can help you MASTER this area of your life!
If you're ready to begin your transformation, please visit my coaching page.