Facebook status updates that are DHV

[Jay-T]

Another thing that really seems to be catching on is DHVing each other through FB status's. I know that NSM, me, KOA, DJ and a couple others do this. It's getting some great responses too. I got a message about 2 minutes after KOA posted an awesome status on my wall from a very hot chick.
"Wow it seems like your friends really like you...my friends only put jokes about me on my wall"

[DJNinja]

got a message about 2 minutes after KOA posted an awesome status on my wall from a very hot chick.
"Wow it seems like your friends really like you...my friends only put jokes about me on my wall"

IOI!!!!

The stuff works. I had a HOT girl who had me friendzoned suddenly start giving me IOIs recently, and just two days ago when I saw her she said that she had no idea I was soooo cool. She specifically mentioned all of the cool things that you guys have been posting on my Wall. Hahaha. WINNING.

[Maestro]

So I've been seeing a lot of you guys trying to DHV each other on Facebook which is awesome and a great thing to do. By winging each other on FB, it also DHV's you. So keep at it.

However,

Be careful that you aren't posting gay shit on each others walls. Some of the ones I've seen have been over the top and don't look genuine. Look kiss ass or extreme rather than real compliments or humorous. And a couple of them looked like a guy hitting on another guy. So keep them fun and funny.

[kosmos]

obnoxious things usually get the best attention. and things that draw attention to you, are offensive, or are just plain arrogant.

sometimes i'll put up funny lines from tv shows or movies, but usually only when they are something obnoxious. i quote ari gold and charlie sheen a lot. i also constantly refer to myself in the third person when i'm posting on my own wall. those of you that are friends with me on facebook know i have a quite a fb following because of my nonsense that i post.

don't ever post anything negative. ever. if you're sick, if you're having a bad day, if you're depressed...a facebook status is NOT the place to complain about it. nobody wants to hear that, and it doesn't draw sympathy. it's boring. only time i'll ever post anything negative is if something ridiculous happens, then i'll post about it in a sheen style rant that is funny and borderline offensive, because i usually get a lot of likes and comments on things like that.

start developing yourself as a social media personality. be funny. be arrogant. but all in fun. don't be a douche. post a status on your page that just says "My Name Likes This". but put your actual name in the my name spot. and then like your own post. very simple, but i'll still do that from time to time. i went to a funeral a few weeks ago and saw some family that i haven't seen in years, but i'm fb friends with them. when i entered, i heard people whispering "yeah, KOA is here. you know him right? from fb". and while i was making the rounds saying hello, somebody yelled out "KOA likes this!!!" i smiled and did a wave to the crowd. i was a celebrity with people i barely knew. sucks it was at a funeral, but the point is...people know me.

So you're officially giving us permission to steal this?

Lol I thought about it, but it was so original and you I figured I'd feel bad for doing it lol.

[KingOfAces]

kosmos, i don't care if somebody borrows one of my status's once in awhile, but don't just copy everything from me. i was just giving some examples.

maestro makes a great point and i completely agree.

also, some people are just idiots. i've got several people from the community on my facebook who are in danger of getting deleted. i actually refer to them as "cockblock (insert name here)". people i don't even really know who just like to talk shit. if i post a status, and you feel the need to immediately comment disagreeing with me and trying to make me look like an idiot, then we have problems. these people are not very good at what they do, that's why i just let them go because usually they make themselves look like dumb asses. but they try to amog you on your own page. well don't do this. it's gay. it's stupid. it doesn't make you look cool. so if anyone tries to do this, i'll destroy them. lol.

one last thing. BE A REAL PERSON!!! i see so many "pua's" on facebook that update their status twice a day and it is ALWAYS: a cut and paste of bravos status, a cut and paste of my status, a joke they got off twitter from a comedian, a cocky line from a book, etc. stop. this is not cool. you have to be a real person. just posting things like this is NOT a dhv. it will actually DLV you. you need to have a life and be a person, and throw your funny comments and updates in the mix when you see fit...

[DrPepper]

kosmos, i don't care if somebody borrows one of my status's once in awhile, but don't just copy everything from me. i was just giving some examples.

maestro makes a great point and i completely agree.

also, some people are just idiots. i've got several people from the community on my facebook who are in danger of getting deleted. i actually refer to them as "cockblock (insert name here)". people i don't even really know who just like to talk shit. if i post a status, and you feel the need to immediately comment disagreeing with me and trying to make me look like an idiot, then we have problems. these people are not very good at what they do, that's why i just let them go because usually they make themselves look like dumb asses. but they try to amog you on your own page. well don't do this. it's gay. it's stupid. it doesn't make you look cool. so if anyone tries to do this, i'll destroy them. lol.

one last thing. BE A REAL PERSON!!! i see so many "pua's" on facebook that update their status twice a day and it is ALWAYS: a cut and paste of bravos status, a cut and paste of my status, a joke they got off twitter from a comedian, a cocky line from a book, etc. stop. this is not cool. you have to be a real person. just posting things like this is NOT a dhv. it will actually DLV you. you need to have a life and be a person, and throw your funny comments and updates in the mix when you see fit...

It's sad that you have to post this. Everything you wrote makes solid sense and you would think guys could figure it out on their own, which is why I say it's unfortunate that you even have to remind people of it. And guys trying to get one up on you on your own page is absolutely ridiculous. Unfortunately the world is full of idiots.

I deactivated my FB account for about 3 years and have only recently deactivated it, deleting all my friends and basically starting over. I don't use it much, and I only have 10-11 friends right now, but if it looks like a tool to pick up more women I may start ramping it up. By the way if you guys want someone else to pad your stats and not be a dumb ass feel free to send me a message on here and i'll friend you on there. I could probably use the help more than you guys. Especially if people start noticing I have friends in Vegas, SoCal, Hawaii, and all these other places.

[Crazy Serb]

KingOfAces, dude, now I'm curious how can I find you on Facebook... I wanna follow along as well!

[Bandit]

kosmos, i don't care if somebody borrows one of my status's once in awhile, but don't just copy everything from me. i was just giving some examples.

maestro makes a great point and i completely agree.

also, some people are just idiots. i've got several people from the community on my facebook who are in danger of getting deleted. i actually refer to them as "cockblock (insert name here)". people i don't even really know who just like to talk shit. if i post a status, and you feel the need to immediately comment disagreeing with me and trying to make me look like an idiot, then we have problems. these people are not very good at what they do, that's why i just let them go because usually they make themselves look like dumb asses. but they try to amog you on your own page. well don't do this. it's gay. it's stupid. it doesn't make you look cool. so if anyone tries to do this, i'll destroy them. lol.

one last thing. BE A REAL PERSON!!! i see so many "pua's" on facebook that update their status twice a day and it is ALWAYS: a cut and paste of bravos status, a cut and paste of my status, a joke they got off twitter from a comedian, a cocky line from a book, etc. stop. this is not cool. you have to be a real person. just posting things like this is NOT a dhv. it will actually DLV you. you need to have a life and be a person, and throw your funny comments and updates in the mix when you see fit...

I took KoA's initial post as a Green Light.

Since then, I have Never STOLEN any of his posts. I don't need to. I post what is relevant/funny to me. Some hit, some miss. What I've taken from KoA is referring to myself in the third person, liking my own status, etc. I actually started posting "(Real Name) Approves This." After I "LIKED" a status, or I posted a new status. Finally, someone asked me what was up with "Approving" and "liking" my own Status, my reply:

A "(Real Name) Approves This" is equivalent to approximately 13 "likes".

I had 2 likes from that and 4 texts, saying AWESOME! Love It, You are so money, etc. shortly after posting.


On a side note, hopefully I wasn't one of KoA's Cockblockers. I posted 1 thing that I can remember that after posting I realized would probably not be taken the way I intended, NOR was appropriate for a guy that I haven't really met. Made me realize, BEFORE KoA's POST, that after interacting with a people on this forum and even thought they seem like really great guys, when I post on their page, I need to respect their real lives and realize that different social circles interact within different ways.

I have probably 5 friends that can pretty much say whatever they want to me on FB. Everyone knows we are close and they can get away with anything. It's good ol' ballbusting guy nature...sometimes we all have to check ourselves to remember while we may interact with people from this forum on FB, and we may even meet them a few times...we are not in the SAME social circle that they interact with on a daily basis.

Anyways, hope everyone had a great Friday, I've been wanting to write part of that for awhile. KoA, if I ever say anything inappropriate, please let me know....Serious Respect for you bro.

-Bandit-

[Bandit]

BTW, some posts that have worked for me. Steal away:

Bandit rule of the day: If Bandit let's you cut in front of him in traffic and you don't give the courtesy waive, he will PIT stop your ass into the wall.

Loonnnnnggggg ass week at work, long day today with no lunch...tired and hungry...but when one of your best friends calls and says "Boys Night Out",Bandit just cowboys up and preps for an epic adventure. Tonight's drinking will be sponsored by Monster Energy Drink.

Tuesday, its exactly like Monday only spelled different.

How this weekend survived the beatdown Bandit put on it I'm not sure....well played weekend, well played.


They tried to write me a ticket for being too awesome ...but I showed them my badge. ...all is good. (When dressed as LT. Dangle from Reno 911)

My dog Buud always reminds me that its the simple things in life that really matter. His greatest joy today was taking a dump midway through his walk....that is what true happiness is apparently all about. Thanks Buud.

****Hopefully you get the idea. I run a cocky/funny type of game because it fits my personality. DO NOT STEAL ANY of these if it does not fit your personality. That is the BIGGEST thing I've seen go awry in the PUA game. Figure out who YOU are and accentuate that person, don't try to be someone that you're not.

[Crazy Serb]

p.s. - if you want an unlimited source of just pure money one liners to use in your profiles, head over to the list of "The Most Interesting Man in the World" quotes:

http://www.themostinterestingmaninthewo ... es-top-10/

and then go through all 50+ pages of comments, as most of the lines added in the comments are absolutely hilarious.